Spring Cleaning for the Soul

This is not a particularly attractive photo to me. I guess it reminds me of the household chores I'd rather neglect this Saturday afternoon. I tend to equate cleaning with work, and while work is not a bad word to me, after the intensity of the shelter-in-place, pandemic work weeks I have, I find myself bone tired by Friday afternoon. The idea of picking up a mop or a scrub brush is not appealing.

I want to write about another sort of cleaning today: spring cleaning for the soul. It's an inside-out rather than an outside-in sort of cleaning, and it is calling to me. I feel a sense of urgency, like I need to "get my house in order" now. If I don't, I'll miss an important open moment in history. The Greeks have a term for such a moment: Kairos. Kairos, as I understand it, means a "loaded moment," a time when anything could happen. It is highly charged, potentiated time, a place where all the rivers converge. It is the propitious moment for action.

And isn't that just where we are? Hasn't the pandemic left us high and dry in the potentiated present moment? Let me slow down for a moment, and create a little more context . . .

When we receive diagnosis of a serious illness, our life changes. We start to do real work on two fronts. On the physical side, we begin to care for ourselves differently, paying attention to our bodies, and often giving them some overdue TLC. On spiritual side, we usually do a deep, reevaluation of our priorities. We decide what and who matters most. We often let go of things that have outlived their usefulness for us. We clean house, inside and out. Perhaps this sort of work is happening to us on a global basis right now, and coronavirus has us all reevaluating our lives.

If this is so, and I believe it is, we are alive during a unique moment in human history, literally a "grow or die" moment. Change begins with endings, and we have already experienced many endings: loss of jobs, changes in relationships, loss of plans and expectations, and in some cases loss of life. We have worked through many endings, done some grieving, and now we find ourselves in the uncomfortable and murky middle stage of change. We have some of our old world and intimations of a new, but nothing is clear yet. The caterpillar in its cocoon has turned to mush, but the butterfly has not yet emerged.

So, we are literally doing deep work here in the chrysalis during this middle stage of change, whether we are aware or not. Kairos. We are been re-loomed for a new beginning, although we do not yet know the shape of our butterfly wings. How do we prepare? Is it even possible to prepare? I believe that two things are required in such a moment of kairos: first, STAY AWAKE and pay deep attention in the present moment, and while doing that we do some deep cleaning on the home front.

Breakdowns only lead to break throughs when we are ready to let go of the old forms, the narratives and belief structures that have bound us, often unconsciously, and have helped us create our current reality. The housecleaning I speak of, the spring cleaning for the soul, involves a deep look at the parts of our lives and the beliefs that no longer serve us. For me, that means sweeping debris out of some dark corners I'd rather not look at and making some hard decisions: does it stay or does it go?

How do we do this? I think recognizing the things that need release is the hardest part. That's why I spoke of staying awake and fully present. These interesting times are forcing us into the sort of uncomfortable places that push these underground beliefs and practices to the surface. If we pay attention, if we are present in the moment, we can and will notice them.

Then comes the easy (to say) and hard (to do) part of relax and release . . . let it go. We won't be able to use those new wings we are developing if we are weighed down by a host of fears, worries and damaging beliefs about ourselves and others. It is time to lighten the load. I want to be ready for our new beginning, in whatever surprising form it takes, so I'm making space in my life right now, and doing that by discarding the old patterns and forms. When the new beginning comes, I want to be open hearted and ready, not looking back over my shoulder in longing for what was or what I thought should happen.

Let's get out those cleaning supplies, then open the doors and windows wide to let fresh air and a spring breeze purify us, from the inside out!